We have three biological children, but always knew we wanted to add to our family. After attending a conference three years ago on "Widows and Orphans," both our hearts were drawn to adoption. The time finally seems right to take a step of faith and pursue it.
In 2013 we made phone calls, wrote emails, surfed the web, and read books to find the right path for us to follow. There are so many questions to ask before you even take one step:
Domestic or International?
Private or Agency?
A healthy child or one with special needs?
An older child or baby?
We have settled on international - and have picked the country - China! We have decided that we want a little girl and as long as she is younger than our youngest, she doesn't have to be a baby. We are open to what is called "Minor Correctable Needs." So she will have a health problem, but not too severe. We have chosen our agency.
A few people so far have asked us "Why adoption?" Maybe not in those exact words, but they are still curious as to the "why." Why would we adopt when I could just get pregnant?
When Jason and I were first married, before we even tried to have kids, I knew that adoption would be on the table - but it was always in the context of "If I cannot have my own kids...." or "We will try to have our 'own kids' first, then try adoption." Many people struggle with infertility. It is real and it is heart-breaking. I have feelings of guilt sometimes when I think about being able to get pregnant. I cannot pretend to even know about their pain.
Sometimes we can see adoption as "Plan B."
The more Jason and I have read about adoption, especially Russell Moore's book and a sermon by John Piper, we realize that adoption does not have to be "Plan B." Adoption is just one route that you can use to become a parent. Adoption was always for me like a "Plan B." It was always a second-choice and viewed as something less desirable than biological children. I've come to see it in a very different light.
For God, adoption was always "Plan A."
Ephesians 1:5 - "He predestined us to adoption as sons through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the kind intention of His will"
With God, adoption was His FIRST choice.
With God - adoption is priority.
With God - adoption was everything.
With God - adoption is at the heart of the gospel.
Why did we chose adoption then?
The answer seems easy: from the simple command to "care for the widows and orphans." God has placed it on our hearts. It seems trivial to say it that way, but it is the truth. We were drawn to adoption by the Holy Spirit and after studying God's word, realized that it is a beautiful picture of our own adoption by God. So instead of asking "Why adopt?" We are asking ourselves "Why NOT adopt?"
I am NOT saying if you are trying to have biological children first you are wrong. Or if you did adopt after struggling with infertility you did so with incorrect motives.
I am trying to encourage those who might adopt to see it as something just as wonderful as having biological children! You do not have to "wait to have your own" before even thinking about adoption! Adoption is a great Plan A!
Resources:
These are books/audio/video that Jason and I have both reviewed.
Keep checking back as this list will grow longer!
Books:
Adopted for Life: the Priority of Adoption for Christians and Churches
by Russell Moore
Orphanology
(by various authors)
Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew
by Sherrie Eldridge
Praying Through Your Adoption
by Michele C Scott
Cross Cultural Adoption
by Caryn Abramowitz
Audio/Video
Sermon "Adoption: the Heart of the Gospel"
by John Piper
Somewhere Between - documentary
Wo Ai Ni Mommy - documentary
Found in China - documentary
Children's Books
God Found Us You
by Lisa Bergren
God Gave Us You
by Lisa Bergren
Tell Me Again About the Night I Was Born
by Jamie Lee curtis
Click the link below to see the latest update:
Adoption Posts
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